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Jon and Kate Gosselin announced they are getting a divorce, and TLC has temporarily halted production on their show “Jon & Kate Plus 8”. But never fear Gosselin lovers. Spike TV has signed a deal with Jon to do a new reality show tentatively titled “Jon & Cake Plus 6”. Follow Jon as he adjust ..
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There have been a few celebrity responses to the whole Perez Hilton getting punched incident. It is not surprising that celebrities are being sassy towards the noted sodomite and celebrity blogger. No word yet if any celebrities are going to doodle penises on his pic and post them on their blog though. Kelly Clarkson: “I’m ..
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Matthew McConaughey announced that his girlfriend Camila Alves is expecting their second child. He posted the following on his website: “Happy Father’s Day. It’s my first, and the last 11 months with Levi and Camila have been the most rewarding adventure to date,” McConaughey writes. “We have more blessed news to celebrate this Father’s Day ..
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will.i.am of the Black Eyed Peas is one of our most hated infidels. For years I have prayed to Allah to smite him from the earth. I even went as far as to email my cousin Amin who knows a guy who knows a guy who knows Osama Bin Laden’s 11th son to see if ..
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I pine for the days when Hollywood actors were men. Guys that could wear tiny little short shorts and still kick the living shit out of people. Now that is someone I can respect. It really reflects poorly on our society that effeminate Marys like Zac Efron and Robert Pattinson are revered as Hollywood hunks. ..
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Dear Diary: I was attacked by screaming girls again today. They scare me with their demands. They keep calling me Edward and they want me to bite them. I guess it is because I made a stupid movie about sparkling vampires, but I could of sworn I was gay in that movie. I mean I am ..
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MTV star Rob Dyrdek got so drunk with John Mayer on Saturday, that he had to go to the hospital to get his stomach pumped. Whether his stomach was full of semen is uncertain, but I think we all know what John Mayer had planned. Don’t Get Drunk with John Mayer was last modified: April 12th, 2024 ..
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According to the state of California, cutting off your tits and having your clit shaped into a penis can grant you rights to marry the same sex. Chastity Bono, a.k.a Chaz, has just completed the necessary steps to legally marry a girl. When asked what the benefits were of being a male, Chaz quickly shouted “Pistol ..
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In a move to avoid bankruptcy California has fired their state sponsored slut. “The upkeep was just too much. The makeup alone was costing the state as much as our public parks system” said Sally Sutherland a representative from California’s Skanks and Whores division. Californians are understandably outraged by the fact that they are now ..
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For the first time in over thirty years, Pat O’Brien managed to pick up a phone, dial the number of a female colleague and leave a clean, inoffensive message. The achievement comes several months after the 60 year-old O’Brien completed his second stint in rehab. For O’Brien, the compulsive desire to drink and do drugs ..
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Proving that in today’s world you need not be funny or talented to have your own late night talkshow, NBC has handed over Conan O’Brien’s spot on Late Night to the utterly average “comedian” Jimmy Fallon. After leaving SNL to pursue a career as a leading man in such blockbusters as Taxi and Fever Pitch, ..
Barack Obama
Barack Obama has named his Secretary of Defense… and he’s a Colonel! In a move that will surely shake up the status quo in Washington, Barack Obama chose Colonel Sanders to be his Secretary of Defense. This is a bold selection that will set the tone for Obama’s new international relations agenda. Col. Sanders is ..
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Celebjihad.com has confirmed that author/journalist Christopher Hitchens is “dreadfully tired” of watching you masturbate. Describing your masturbatory habits as “pure cliché and banality,” Hitchens finds fault not only with your “pedestrian” technique (the fist coupled with occasional deviations to the backhand), but also with your choice of pornographic aides. “(Your) sole reliance on girl-on-girl orgy ..
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Thanksgiving is a time to reflect and “give thanks” for our many blessings. We asked several of today’s hottest celebrities what they were thankful for…. Britney Spears is thankful for her two wonderful children…and Roe v. Wade…in no particular order. Guy Ritchie is thankful to be over his debilitating eight-year case of dry twat. Perez Hilton is ..
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It’s been less than a month since DJ AM, who obviously has some sort of deal with Satan, survived a jet crash that took the lives of four others. Two skin-graft surgeries later, AM was back to work last night, manning the decks for Jay-Z’s concert marking the reopening of the Hollywood Palladium. And by ..
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Hey folks, Charlie Sheen here. I wrote this article as a guide for you young men and women out there in relationships. You could say I’m kind of an expert on relationships since I’ve had 722 in my 40+ years of living and loving. First lets define what a relationship is. A relationship is a ..
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On Monday the Dow Jones Industrial Average suffered its largest one-day point loss after the House of Representatives rejected a proposed bailout plan. What does this mean for American taxpayers and the ailing U.S. economy? CelebJihad.com senior business correspondent Mel Gibson answers your questions in layman’s terms. Question #1: What is the main cause of ..
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