Ke$ha Is An American Sex Symbol

Pop star and American sex symbol Ke$ha emerged from the ocean yesterday in what heathens believe to be a “sexy” swimsuit.

As Muslims it is hard for us to understand the degenerate American aesthetic, which has been molded by years of reality television and alcohol abuse. Unlike Americans we like our women to have large mammaries for feeding babies, and a tight round butt for pulling the plow… and anal.

However, in America 90% of their women look and act like the she-beast Ke$ha (the other 10% are fatter). Their bodies are lumpy and well-worn from their heathen Western lifestyle of drugs and anonymous sex. I can not imagine a world in which our women look up to a monster like Ke$ha, but for the American male it is their nightmare reality.

We must redouble our efforts to make sure the Ke$ha makes no inroads into Muslim culture, and the only way to do that is to ban all music and shelter our women further. Together we can prevent the nightmare pictured above from happening to our holy Muslim muff. Allahu Akbar!