Jessica Alba Humps A Hula Hoop

Jessica Alba humps a hula hoop in the screen shots below from her new movie “Dear Eleanor”.

In this film Jessica Alba plays the feminist icon Eleanor Gapbottom, the first woman ever to successfully insert a hula hoop completely into her rectum. Not surprisingly Jessica Alba insisted on doing all of her own stunts for this film, and was able to replicate Eleanor’s remarkable feat after only two hours of practice.

Yes Eleanor Gapbottom was a true feminist hero, as she paved the way for the brazen celebrity whores of today. In fact one could argue that without slutty pioneers like Eleanor women like Jessica Alba would not exist. This idea certainly opens up the prospect of a new “Back To The Future” movie in which a righteous Muslim travels back in time and decapitates all the sass mouthed women who’s incessant yapping provided the impetus for the feminist movement today.