Jessica Alba Nude Scene From “Machete” Extended Cut

The video above appears to feature the extended cut of actress Jessica Alba’s nude shower scene from the film “Machete”.

The release of this extended nude scene is certainly well-timed, as the news just broke that after 17 years of marriage Jessica’s husband is finally kicking her to the curb to make room for a newer model.

Of course back in her heyday, Jessica Alba was one of the finest specimen of female livestock that heathen Hollywood ever produced. And every year she would desperately try to secure herself a spot in a virile Muslim’s harem by parading out her near perfect posterior on her hands and knees in skimpy bikini bottoms (as we can see in the compilation video above).

Unfortunately for Jessica, her dream of serving as a receptacle for potent Islamic ball batter never became a reality, as us Muslims always suspected that she may be a Mexican. As a result Jessica is now a washed-up 40-something divorcee, who unfortunately is unlikely to do the honorable thing and recycle herself with a revolver on top of her family farm’s compost heap.