Jennifer Lawrence, Kate Upton, And Taylor Swift Win Big At The Oscars

The Oscars were held last last night in Hollywood and of course no one really gives a baker’s f*ck about who won the awards, as the real competition is to see which female celebrities can whore their bodies best in fancy dresses at the Vanity Fair after party. This year the big winners were none other then actress Jennifer Lawrence, model Kate Upton, and singer Taylor Swift.

First up we have Kate Upton, who was both the most surprising and biggest winner of the night. The last time we saw Kate Upton she had gained about 30lbs, and appeared to be riding a non-stop train to Porkerville. However as you can see in the photos below, Kate has pulled herself back from the abyss and is once again the relatively in shape woman with enormous titties that the infidel masses fell in love with.

Next up we have Oscar winning actress Jennifer Lawrence. Of course Jennifer wasn’t going to win any awards this year, as even by the Oscars’ shitty standards she sucked in every movie she appeared in. However, to make up for this lack of public acknowledgement Jennifer greatly upped her slut game, and exposes a good deal of skin in this crop top high slit black dress.

Lastly, we have Taylor Swift in the photos below. Who despite looking like she got her hair styled by some autistic kid with a pair of scissors and a bowl, still managed to gain some of the spotlight with an extremely low cut dress.