Madonna = Mary Poppins on Meth

If you’ve ever wondered what Mary Poppins would look like if she was on Meth, Madonna has been kind enough to show you.

This week, the Material “Girl” celebrated her 51st birthday in Italy by desperately trying to keep the sun from melting her thin layer of remaining skin.

This is Madonna’s first birthday since her break up with Guy Ritchie. But don’t worry,  Madge, I’m sure this photo will cause Guy to come running back, or at the very least make it difficult for him to maintain an erection with the 20-something stripper he’s probably banging.

Happy Birthday, Madonna!