Britney Spears Still Looks Weird in a Bikini

Britney Spears doesn’t look bad in this bikini, per se, but something just doesn’t seem right. It’s like seeing a woman in a business meeting or reading a book, it just feels off.

While she has outgrown the “fat crazy Britney”, she hasn’t gone back to “sexy Britney.” Much of this might be in the eye of the beholder, as once you’ve seen bald, fat Britney hitting a car with an umbrella, it’s tricky to go back to seeing her in that schoolgirl outfit.

Someone should probably tell her that it’s time to hit the plastic surgery circuit and see what’s out there. I speak for America when I say that I’m sick of not lusting over Britney, and I think a lot of creepy old men will agree with me here. Get her under the knife, make her look like she did in 1999, but with bigger breasts, and she’ll be back and ready for prime time.

Until then, we’ll be subjected to pics like the above, with tiny muffin tops, and musings about what might have been.