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CelebJihad has just received these exclusive photos of 50 Cent and “Transformers” director Michael Bay picking up some floozies to take on the next available train to Pound Town. Since I am an expert on picking up slutty women at clubs, (I lure them back to my place with promises of sex then when we ..
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What if celebrities were fat? Man has pondered this question for centuries. Luckily we have people like Jessica Simpson and Kelly Clarkson to show us what it looks like when celebs get fat, but that didn’t stop people from Photoshopping other celebrities to see what they would look like fat. Of course they Photoshopped Beyonce ..
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Edi Gathegi, the actor who portrays Laurent the vampire in the Twilight films, has really let himself go. Sources close to the actor say that Gathegi has been distraught since learning that his character was to be killed off in The Twilight Saga: New Moon, which premiers today. “Ever since he found out that Laurent ..
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Breaking news: Years of abusing anabolic steroids and prescription painkillers may be harmful to your health! UFC heavyweight champion Brock “HGH” Lesnar is in serious condition and may be transferred to the Mayo clinic to have “major surgery” according to UFC President Dana White. White went on to say that Brock’s condition is so serious ..
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What if instead of being the immoral, soul sucking, blasphemers that they are, celebrities became their names? Of course it would never happen because celebrities despise a humble pious life dedicated to the glory of Allah. Instead they wish to mock Allah and portray themselves as Gods. However, thanks to the witchcraft of Photoshop we ..
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Clint Eastwood is such a dick tease! Look at him engulfing this banana so sensually. He knows exactly what he is doing to us guys. Clint Eastwood has been setting men’s loins ablaze for years with his seductive snarls, and analogous use of gun play. However now he has gone too far. How am I ..
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BET intends to create a new reality show staring convicted animal abuser and NFL QB Michael Vick, the Los Angeles Times is reporting. According to our sources, the show, tentatively titled Michael Vick: The Dogg Pound, will begin filming at the end of the NFL season. It will chronicle Vick as he performs his court ..
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Richard Ross is the new chief of Walt Disney Studios, and the ghost of Walt Disney is fuming! “Ross, that’s a Jew name,” said the irate specter of Disney speaking through a Ouija board. “I don’t want a heeb running my studio.” Richard Ross is taking the position at a time when both Disney and ..
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It doesn’t open until January, but critics are already talking ‘Oscar’ for Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s latest film, The Tooth Fairy. After watching this new trailer, it’s easy to see why. ‘Best Picture’ is all but assured, and the fact that The Rock, Billy Crystal, and Ashley Judd all star in this cinematic tour de ..
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In a move that is sure to upset the bulk of his elderly viewers, Jay Leno has admitted to having sex with his wife Mavis. “I’m sorry to everyone who I’ve offended or let down,” said a tearful Leno during a press conference on Friday. Reaction from fans was swift, and generally negative. Typical Leno ..
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Back Hair Back hair is never a desirable trait, but if you’ve got it, you’ve got it. Every once in a great while you’ll run into that one guy who says, “Chicks love it man!” Not true. In fact, the only time back hair was ever celebrated was during one of Alec Baldwin’s sex scenes ..
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Did Jay-Z get a nose job. From the comparison picture above it looks like the answer is yes. His surgeon did an excellent job. Now instead of looking exactly like a camel Jay-Z only looks sort of like a camel. It’s remarkable! Next Jay-Z needs to get his lips trimmed down. Those things are monsters, ..
Randy Quaid and his wife Evi have been arrested after a struggle with police in Texas, TMZ is reporting. Apparently the arresting officers had to wrestle the couple to the ground. Felony arrest warrants had been issued for the Quaids in Santa Barbara, CA for defrauding the public and conspiracy. They’re accused of profiting from ..
David Hasselhoff’s got talent, if you consider drinking life threatening amounts of vodka and living to tell the tale a “talent”, which we do! It’s been reported that paramedics were called to his home in Encino, CA on Sunday where the America’s Got Talent star had been on a bender for more than a day. ..
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Despite his wealth and power, there’s still one thing that money can’t buy for Elton John: a Ukrainian AIDS baby. In fact, it would be much easier for Sir Elton to go out and get AIDS than it would be for him to adopt an AIDS infected child. John (pictured left) and his gay lover, ..
There has been a lot of controversy surrounding my brother, Charlie Sheen’s (real name Carlos Estevez) recent article in which he conducts a fictional 20 minute interview with Barack Obama chastising him for not re-investigating 9/11. As a sign of solidarity with my brother Charlie I have decided to write my own fictional interview with ..
Remember Lisa Loeb? Us either, but I guess she’s been knocked up by her husband, Roey Hershkovitz (I think he’s Italian). “They’re excited to welcome their first child this winter,” Loeb’s manager told People Magazine. We here at CelebJihad would like to congratulate the happy couple. We’re glad they decided to waive their legal right ..
The “laugh track” has a long and storied history of letting morons know when to laugh. But when paired with the wrong footage, the use of a laugh track becomes highly inappropriate. The Deer Hunter See the rest of the clips at ScreenJunkies.com… Inappropriate Movie Laugh Tracks was last modified: September 4th, 2009 by Jimmy ..
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